out of context

Ok, so you know those really cute things that you do with your kids in private that just don’t seem to translate well or have quite the same comedic effect on others when done in public?  Well, we have a few doozies to share with you.  Here goes:

1.  Telling her preschool teacher first thing Monday morning that “Everybody has boobs”

Yes, of course there was a longer explanation of which this excerpt was taken.  When she noticed her chest one day, she asked what they were so I told her.  And so she wouldn’t think that she was an anomaly or sense a weighted tone to the topic, I concluded with a light-hearted reveal that everyone in fact has boobs…

2.  Yelling “F_ _ k, F_ _k, F_ _ k”

… in the Target parking lot and again while my mother-in-law was changing her diaper.  It was pretty funny when our 18 month old repeated it at home and we didn’t think she’d remember or do it again (or in public at the top of her lungs for that matter).  But admittedly, I was secretly proud of the fact that she used it in the correct context…

3.  “Mommy says ‘dubba’”

No I don’t teach my child complete gibberish but we have this ‘funny’ thing that we do…whenever I jumble my words while talking to her, I make a joke and laugh at myself by acknowledging that I’m not making any sense and start over.  She finds this very funny and wants to share the joke with others…of course, inadvertently making me look like a complete idiot in the process!

4.  “Daddy tried to get it my bath, my pajamas and my big girl bed but I said ‘no, Daddy, stop!’”

My husband found a great way to speed up the bedtime process.  In order to get our daughter in the bath, into her pajamas and in bed for story time in under 2 hours, he pretends that he’s racing her to it.  It works like a charm every time as she runs to the bath, grabs her PJs out of the drawer for me and hops into bed before daddy beats her to it.  Of course, she loves to share the story with complete strangers so as you can imagine, I often find myself saying, “Let me clarify…”

5.  Responding to the rhetorical question of, “You are so cute, where did you get that face?”, with the very thoughtful reply of, “Umm…Target”

Ok, so we spend a lot of time at Target!

We’d love to hear your funny stories (perhaps so we don’t feel so bad about teaching our kids curse words in utero) so please write into our blog and share!